She was leaving, packing up all the belongings she could fit into her Honda and moving across the country. Birmingham, Ala., is approximately 1,300 miles from Colorado Springs, Colo. It might as well have been on the other side of the world. I didn’t know if I would see her again.
My heart felt like a caged lion, pacing back and forth inside my chest, searching desperately for a way out, a plan of attack, a weakness in the bars—anything I could do besides wait and feel helpless.
Yet this had been the plan all along. I knew that she was leaving, moving away from home after graduating from college, following God’s leading to new places and new lessons in her own life. Her stopover at home was only temporary. But two months was long enough for us to spend lots of time together—and for me to fall in love with this beautiful girl named Janna who had been a close friend for several years. Could it all be over so quickly?
There must be something I could do.
I stayed up late the night before her departure, journaling frantically, writing ideas to change her mind and pouring out requests to God. I had sought His guidance and committed this relationship to Him from the start. I thought He had been opening doors to move forward. Could this be part of His plan? It wasn’t the way I would write the script. Maybe if I showed up on her doorstep with flowers or cool music playing she would change her mind, confess her love for me and stay in town.
Lord, What Should I Do?!
I searched His Word for solace and wisdom.
“Thou shalt go to her and win her love” was the verse I was looking for, but I can assure you it’s not in the Bible. Instead, “Wait on the Lord” seemed to echo from its pages. There must be something else, I thought. You’ve got another message for me—right, God?
I turned to the love chapter, 1 Corinthians 13. “Love is patient.”
Still not what I wanted. Doing nothing just didn’t seem to make much sense. Didn’t God get it? Janna was leaving . . . moving . . . a long way away. It was now or never for a deeper relationship—or was it?
If God wasn’t going to give me the right message, maybe my brother could help. “Don’t you get it?” he said. “Praying is the most powerful action you can take. If this relationship is part of God’s will, He can work out the details.”
Huh, good point. Trusted friends who can give you solid, biblical advice are valuable. And those words did seem to line up with what the Holy Spirit was already saying through Scripture and in my conscience. Maybe God was giving me His guidance all along, even if it was a little different from what I had hoped for.
Back to the journal. OK, God, You know what’s best. You know my desires and that I don’t want Janna to leave. Help me to want Your will even more. I’m choosing to trust You in this relationship, even though these circumstances don’t look good. Thanks for the leading of Your Spirit. Please give me the strength to follow it.
I didn’t cause a big scene. I said goodbye to Janna and wished her the best. We agreed to trust the Lord with our futures and lay off communication for a while. My emotions screamed, “No!” But there was peace in my spirit.
Fast Forward
One year later, I proposed marriage to Janna. She wholeheartedly accepted. She had followed the Lord’s leading away and then back again, allowing Him to use the distance in between to clarify His path for us. God’s guidance was good. His Spirit was trustworthy. And by surrendering my desires and following His leadership even when it didn’t make sense to me, I was confident of His will when it really mattered. Looking back, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
God has promised more than His help; He’s provided His Helper—His living, moving Spirit within us to point to God’s best. Rather than spell out every detail ahead for us, He works through relationship with us to shape our character and teach us to rely on Him. What are you hearing from the Holy Spirit?
How To Listen
• Know your guide. Do you realize what—or whom—you’ve got? Think about this. The third person of the Trinity, God himself, is living inside you. And He’s not just hanging out. He’s there to guide you, help you, gift you, strengthen you, comfort you and stand up for you. Look up Holy Spirit in your Bible’s concordance and jot down what some verses tell us about the Holy Spirit’s role.
• Listen to His voice. The help is there. It’s up to you to use it. Philippians 4:6-7 tells us to take all our requests to God with thankfulness and that His peace will guard our heart and mind. Got a question? A problem? A difficult decision to make? A temptation to overcome? When we pray, God listens, and His Spirit often guides us by providing a sense of peace about the direction we should go, even if peace seems crazy in the midst of the circumstances. Slow down. Talk to God. Search His Word. Listen to His Spirit. Back it up with the Bible.
• Double check with the Bible. Jesus told His disciples, “But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you” (John 14:26). Did you catch the word remind? God’s character is always consistent. The direction from His Spirit must line up with the truth of His Word. If you think He is directing you into a choice, activity, relationship or direction that contradicts His Word, think again. If your circumstances match up with Scripture, go for it. It’s always a good idea to seek counsel from one or two mature Christians—perhaps your parents—as well. They can affirm or redirect your thinking. 
